Why Andrea Yates’ Ex-Husband Rusty Still Visits Her Decades After She Drowned Their 5 Children (Exclusive)
Andrea Yates confessed to drowning her five children in the bathtub of their home in the Houston suburb of Clear Lake, Texas in 2001In March 2002, Andrea was convicted of capital murder and sentenced to life in prison. That verdict was later reversed, and in July 2006, she was found not guilty by reason of insanityHer attorneys argued that she had suffered from postpartum depression and postpartum psychosis
On June 20, 2001, a stay-at-home mother called 911 to confess she had drowned her five children in the bathtub of their home in the Houston suburb of Clear Lake, Texas.
The shocking crime made national and international news and led to the arrest of then-37-year-old Andrea Yates.
The Legal Journey
In March 2002, Andrea was convicted of capital murder and sentenced to life in prison in connection with the deaths of Noah, 7, John, 5, Paul, 3, Luke, 2, and 6-month-old Mary. That verdict was later reversed, and in July 2006, she was found not guilty by reason of insanity.
Her attorneys argued that she had suffered from postpartum depression and postpartum psychosis, and that weeks before the murders, her doctor had taken her off of the powerful antipsychotic drug Haldol.
Maintaining Connection
Andrea’s ex-husband Rusty, 61, tells PEOPLE about his life with Andrea, and why he still visits her once a year at a Kerrville, Texas, mental health facility nearly 25 years after the death of their children.
“I try once a year to visit in person and we text back and forth some and talk on the phone some,” Rusty says. “Andrea and I always got along. That’s a time of our life that we both cherish and she’s the only person I can talk to about it. She and I are the only two who can get together and reminisce about what it was like to enjoy those years together.”
A Bittersweet Relationship
Rusty, who divorced Andrea in 2005, says that although they both appreciate each other’s friendship, “it’s bittersweet.”
“I mean, it’s nice to reminisce. Honestly, I never imagined anything like this could happen, especially with her, especially how caring and loving and devoted Andrea is. I don’t hold it against her, but even just communicating with her is a reminder of that. So, we try to focus on the better times, but it’s a little hard to, even in our conversations, avoid that most significant tragedy. And I think that for her, it loomed so large that it’s really kept her from growing, from really living and trying to enjoy the balance of her years. It’s just too big. She can’t get past it.”
Andrea’s Current Life
Andrea has been held at the facility since 2007.
According to previous reporting by PEOPLE, she can undergo a review every year to see if she is competent to leave the facility but has opted each year to waive her right to be reviewed.
According to Rusty, Andrea fully embraced her role as a mother and “to have it end the way that it did is just so devastating for her.”
Andrea “spends a lot more time going over old videos of our family, looking through old pictures that sort of thing because her mind is still sort of stuck there,” says Rusty, who is a computer engineer at NASA’s Johnson Space Center in Houston.
The Struggle with Forgiveness
“I was raised in a tradition where intention matters as much as anything, right? And we’re flawed humans. We can have good intentions and do the wrong thing,” he says. “So, it’s easier for me to forgive Andrea than it is for her to forgive herself because she was raised in a tradition of works. It’s a strict Catholic upbringing. She’s kind of stuck because she has this extremely hard time forgiving herself. It’s like, how do you take something that significant and get past it in life? Or do you get stuck there? And that’s where you’re stuck and that’s it.”
How They Met
Rusty says he met Andrea, who was a nurse at the time, in the late 80s while living at the same apartment complex in Houston.
“One night someone had bumped her car in the parking lot, and I was sitting in my apartment,” he says. “I was talking to somebody on the phone. I heard a knock at the door and opened the door, and it was Andrea. And I literally dropped the phone. She asked me; she said, ‘Hey, do you know anything about that?’ Because she knew that I parked out in the same area she did. And later she admitted that it was just an excuse to meet me.”
“She’d been wanting to meet me,” he adds. “And Andrea is a very shy, kind of reserved person. And if you know her at all, that was a big step for her because she’s not a very forward person at all.”
Building a Family
They married four years later in 1993 and started a family.
“I was almost jealous of the fact that she got to spend so much time with the kids while I had to work all the time,” says Rusty, who participated in ID’s The Cult Behind the Killer: The Andrea Yates Story, which premiered January 6th and is available to stream on HBO Max. “I offered; I said, ‘Hey, we could probably make it if I work halftime and you work halftime.’ And she said, ‘I’m a mother now.’ And I thought, ‘That’s a role that she embraced and being a father is a role that I embraced.'”
“It’s my favorite role in life being a father,” says Rusty, who has a 17-year-old son from a second marriage that has since ended in divorce. “And I honestly think being a mother was [Andrea’s] favorite role.”
Understanding Mental Illness
Rusty’s continued relationship with Andrea highlights the complex intersection of mental illness, tragedy, and human connection. His ability to maintain contact with her despite the unimaginable loss stems from his understanding that the person who committed those acts was not the Andrea he knew, but someone in the grip of severe mental illness.
His perspective on forgiveness rooted in intention rather than action alone allows him to separate the devoted mother and wife he married from the woman suffering from untreated postpartum psychosis who made that horrific 911 call.
The Weight of the Past
Andrea’s inability to move forward, her constant reviewing of family videos and photos, and her choice to remain in the facility year after year all point to the profound guilt and trauma she continues to experience. Unlike Rusty, who has attempted to rebuild his life (remarrying and having another child, though that marriage also ended), Andrea remains frozen in that terrible moment.
The fact that she waives her annual competency reviews suggests she either doesn’t believe she deserves freedom or fears what life outside the facility might bring. Her strict religious upbringing, which Rusty mentions, likely compounds her inability to forgive herself for actions taken while mentally ill.
A Shared History
Rusty’s annual visits serve multiple purposes: they allow him to maintain connection with the only other person who shared those precious years with their children, they provide Andrea with continued human connection and support, and they honor the family they once were before tragedy struck.
His statement that Andrea is “the only person I can talk to about it” underscores the isolating nature of such profound loss. While others can offer sympathy, only Andrea shared those daily moments of parenting their five children the memories Rusty still cherishes despite how that chapter ended.
Moving Forward While Looking Back
The Andrea Yates case continues to spark important conversations about postpartum mental health, the importance of properly treating psychiatric conditions, and how the legal system handles cases involving severe mental illness.
Rusty’s compassionate approach to Andrea, his continued presence in her life, and his public discussion of their tragedy contribute to broader understanding of how families navigate the aftermath of crimes committed by loved ones suffering from mental illness.
As Rusty continues his work at NASA and parents his teenage son, and as Andrea remains in the Kerrville facility surrounded by memories of the children she lost, their annual visits represent a unique bond forged in shared joy and unimaginable sorrow a connection that endures nearly 25 years after the tragedy that changed both their lives forever.