Man Reveals What Midwife Told Him To Do After Wife Gave Birth: ‘Your Turn’

In the delivery room, discussions about another baby are typically far from anyone’s mind. However, one midwife made a bold suggestion that has since sparked a heated debate online.

Aries Kirk, 36, shared her story in a November 21 post on Instagram Threads (@justthekirks) that quickly went viral, amassing over 50,600 likes. She recounted how, after the birth of their second child, Wish, now 6, her midwife suggested her husband consider a vasectomy.

Kirk Family
From left, Greg, 44, Aries, 36, and their daughters Brave, 7, and Wish, 6, pose for a photo outside. The couple are now trying to have a third and final child.
From left, Greg, 44, Aries, 36, and their daughters Brave, 7, and Wish, 6, pose for a photo outside. The couple are now trying to have a third and final child.
Instagram/@justthekirks

“She said, ‘Your wife pushed out two babies for you. It’s your turn to do something for her. Don’t make her have to get an IUD! Go get a vasectomy, so that she doesn’t have to experience anything else down there,'” Kirk quoted in her post.

At the time, the couple dismissed the idea with a laugh and chose an intrauterine device (IUD) instead. Now, as they prepare for their third child, they are revisiting the discussion. Speaking to Newsweek, Kirk and her husband Greg, 44, from Atlanta, Georgia, confirmed their intention to proceed with the procedure after their next baby is born.

“I viewed the comment as something I needed to hear,” Greg said. “It gave me a new perspective on contraception.”

Contraception in Numbers

According to Statista, 65 percent of sexually active women in the U.S. used some form of contraception in 2022, ranging from condoms to implants. Globally, contraceptive use varies due to economic, cultural, and religious factors. As of 2024, only 4 percent of women in North America seeking to delay or avoid pregnancy are not using any contraceptive method.

Vasectomy, a surgical procedure that provides permanent birth control by blocking sperm from leaving the body, is a common choice for approximately 50 million men worldwide. In the United States, over 500,000 men opt for the procedure each year, accounting for about 5% of married men of reproductive age.

Notably, Planned Parenthood reported a staggering 1,200 percent surge in vasectomy appointments on November 6, 2024—the day following Donald Trump‘s victory in the presidential election.

Revisiting the Midwife’s Advice

Kirk Family
Greg, Brave, Wish and Aries smiling for a selfie. A midwife offered her advice when Wish was born but the couple have only just started thinking about the surgery again.
Greg, Brave, Wish and Aries smiling for a selfie. A midwife offered her advice when Wish was born but the couple have only just started thinking about the surgery again.
Instagram/@justthekirks

Reflecting on the midwife’s suggestion, Aries told Newsweek: “I had never even considered the idea of my husband having a vasectomy as our form of birth control. Sharing the story online has made us think about how we wouldn’t be able to have more children if we had proceeded with the vasectomy earlier.”

Greg added: “We appreciated what she said, even though at the time, we didn’t act on it.”

Aries explained that after their third child, Greg is committed to having the surgical procedure. “He loves me and understands that my body has changed so much due to childbirth and having an IUD for seven years. He believes it’s the least he can do to show his love and appreciation.”

A Divided Opinion Online

The couple recently posed the question on Threads: “Do you agree? Should a man get a vasectomy to allow his wife to avoid contraceptive drugs and devices?” The post has garnered nearly 6,000 comments, reflecting a divided opinion.

“Is that a trick question? Of course, he should,” wrote one user. Another agreed, saying: “YES! If the man loves his wife, he will get the vasectomy. All those unnecessary hormones stopping your natural flow are harsh, to say the least. A vasectomy is in-office, and you get the day off.”

However, not everyone shared the sentiment. “No, use condoms. My wife has never dealt with contraception,” one man suggested.

Others criticized the midwife for her approach. “A midwife shouldn’t be telling a man what he should or shouldn’t do with his body. If women demand respect for their bodily autonomy, they should offer the same respect to men,” argued a commenter.

Despite the mixed responses, Aries said she harbors no ill will toward the midwife.

“She was a very ‘tell it like it is’ type of person who often said things that could come off a little offensive to a more sensitive person,” she told Newsweek.

If you have a family dilemma, let us know via life@newsweek.com. We can ask experts for advice, and your story could be featured on Newsweek.